Why is it that all cars are women?” he asked.
“Because they’re fussy and demanding,” answered Zee.
“Because if they were men, they’d sit around and complain instead of getting the job done,” I told him.”
― Patricia Briggs, Silver Borne
What is the first thing that pops into your head when you hear or read the term “stereotypes”? My head recalls the moment when I hear celebs blabbering about how they don’t want to be stereotyped and typecasted in films. How I wish it ended there only! But, it is etched deeply inside our Personalities, Souls, Society and Mindsets. I apparently belong to the matching society you do. My methodology is no different than yours.
Gender stereotypes activate the second a baby’s gender is found out. While there are a million gender stereotypes about females, there are equally the biggest stereotypes about Men, we both get labeled. Don’t worry, we are together in this.
I am about to talk about Men stereotype today. And, we shall talk about Women stereotype in our next. Stereotyping is no different when it’s found out that a boy is on the way. The nursery is decked out in blue, his closet is filled with tiny jeans, polo shirts, and boots, and the theme is usually something like jungle animals or dinosaurs; something tough. Boys’ toys consist of trucks, dinosaurs, action figures, and video games. From the beginning boys are taught to be tough, to be protective, and to defend themselves. Boys are taught that daddy’s go to work and mommy’s stay at home; from their point of view, boys have fun and girls do all the work.
Are you surprised to hear that most parents admit that they do not teach their sons how to do chores such as washing dishes or folding laundry? Instead, boys are made to think that certain household chores are “women’s work”. Parenting is basically the root cause of everything in life. It makes or breaks us. Anyway, let us dive into this further;
- Men are not caring and loving!! Well, we must stop generalizing first, because some of them are. Yes, Some. I am a witness to a situation where men don’t get enough credit for raising a child because it is exclusively credited to women. Men don’t lack powers of empathy in relationships. We have enough songs, poems and movies based on Mother’s love, How about father’s Love?
- Real men don’t do housework!! Counter to the “women are meant to be in the kitchen” stereotype is the perspective that men can’t take care of kids or help around the house. Men who make the choice to focus on raising their children over moving up in their career are seen as soft or unmanly. Dads who are combating this stereotype to be active in raising their kids on a day-to-day basis help to break the cycle of gender equality. Men can’t take care of house chores. Well again, some of them truthfully can’t (blame their mothers or wives) but some definitely can. It is women only who don’t let men learn because they think it’s their job. Let the man learn, you woman or stop complaining!
- They are “Men” so they must be obsessed with sports!! No. Get over it. Some don’t. It is completely acceptable if you hate/dislike/unlike/despise sports. It is as shocking as Women taking up sports. Irony!
- So, I came across an unprecedented stereotype just a few days ago. Men hate salads!! Let me laugh a little. Actually, men hate weight gain and indigestion just as much as women do. Plenty of grown men are proud to eat healthy and even swap healthy tips with their friends.
- Major stereotype; The Strong Silent Type focuses on “being in charge, acting decisively, containing emotion, and succeeding with women.” This stereotype reinforces the assumption that men and boys should always be in control, and that talking about one’s feelings is a sign of weakness. They don’t want to talk about feelings. Perhaps men aren’t as open immediately and indiscriminately as women are, but when they care about someone, they’ll talk about their feelings.
- Real men don’t cry!! Bullshit. Are they Robots? The myth that men are unemotional puts social pressure on boys and men to keep their feelings covered up. This stereotype goes hand-in-hand with the view that men are bad at expressing their feelings and communicating. Anger is the exception. This is one emotion that is deemed “acceptable” for men to feel and express. Turning to anger has devastating consequences when it leads to violence against women, children and other men. And you call a woman crazy when she gets angry, Unacceptable!! Let us talk about that in our next post.
- They don’t like women with opinions!! Well, do they like goats then? Most men assume you’re a bitch if you give an assertive opinion, and don’t sugarcoat it, ammiright? Maybe terrified and insecure little boys. But grown men find a woman who is proud of her opinions attractive. Although, i believe, you do you whether somebody finds it attractive it or not. Yay for me?
- Messy Men? By now we have to know that there are plenty of clean men and there are plenty of messy women. Messiness or cleanliness really has nothing to do with gender, but rather your personality type.
- Men don’t listen!! Sometimes, I don’t listen either, so?? Anyway, if a man has chosen to spend his life with you, it’s because he values your opinions, cherishes your advice, and cares about what’s happening in your life. And, hey don’t accept anyone who tunes you out.
- Men cheat!! Grow up, Women cheat too. There are good people and cheaters in the world. It has nothing to do with gender stereotypes.
- Real men don’t ask for directions!! This one is code for “real men don’t ask for help”. Men are expected to be the providers for their family – the people that others depend on, not the ones that “need” anything. If you’ve ever been in the passenger seat of someone who is lost and won’t ask for directions, you’ll know that this social pressure to avoid asking for help is definitely more trouble than it’s worth.
- One of my Favorites; All Men are Dogs!! Why? What if they want to be a duck, frog or crocodile? Where is the Right to freedom to choose their own spirit animal? Can we just mature and be done with calling men dogs and women bitches respectively? Why so? Because it doesn’t make any sense.
Can you see how many of these actually are true of many men that you know? They may even be true for you personally, but they do not apply to every single man alive. That is what makes them stereotypes; the fact that these things are considered, “the norm” and expected of every male. Each person is an individual and it is perfectly normal for a woman to run her own business while a man stays home with the kids. On the other hand it is also perfectly acceptable for a man to be a nurse or hate sports, or enjoy cooking.
Men and women are individuals; they are more than just male or female. Our gender is only part of who we are; it does not define us as people.