Greta Beccaglia, a female journalist, was sexually harassed by one Fiorentina fan after the Empoli – Fiorentina match. It happened in front of the camera while she was going live for the news in front of the whole world. After her reaction, her studio colleague said, “Don’t let it bother you.” Does this thing need a reaction? Oh my, it most definitely does. One loud protest, loud as the absurdity of this abhorrent event.
One of the comments on the video implied it’s not a coincidence Greta’s number of followers tripled in just two days. The commentator said he would love to see that story reversed, i.e. a man being in her position. Provoked by that comment, I decided to do a small survey. Literally without exception, all the women in my environment experienced some kind of sexual harassment while walking down the streets, and oftentimes it’s not just commenting on physical appearance; sometimes, it’s groping, flashing, stalking.
I had one of those experiences when I was a student returning after classes to my dorm. A gay my age was coming from the opposite side, just when he was to pass me by, he jumped, groped my breast, and went on his way as if nothing happened, turning his head with a satisfactory smile. I cannot describe the anger that accumulated in me at that moment. Only women and girls who have experienced it would be able to understand. That is, almost every woman/girl.
Just the other day, my friend told me how scared she was in elementary school from one of the boys in her building. He was stalking her, trying to touch her, making all kinds of remarks making her feel uncomfortable. At age 12, she was scared to go out by herself, terrified she might find herself alone with him on the street. Luckily it didn’t last long, and after a few weeks, he stopped bothering her; maybe he found a new target. Her friends from the neighborhood would keep her company, but they were also laughing at it sometimes.
When we were in school, boys would usually harass certain girls. The boys would laugh, and the rest of the girls were afraid they’d be next in the line. It was very common when I was growing to see these things; nobody protected us or explained what was actually happening. We were very young and unaware. The list of stories can go on and on.
Facing the unwritten rule that your body is not yours only, but literally, anyone can reach for you whenever they want, changes you and takes away your freedom, forever. This part of the trauma is not even the whole story.
Secondary victimization in the form of condemnations and accusations from the environment is almost always addressed to the girl. She’s asking for it is a popular answer, she is provocative, she doesn’t pay attention to how she’s dressed, when the cat raises its tail it should not be surprised when the tomcat comes, she shows too much skin, and now she is surprised… Because men who harass have no responsibility whatsoever, they have no power over their behavior, over their body, hormones are stronger than their ratio, they act instinctively. Hence, women are the ones that should always think if they are wearing provocative clothes and maybe stimulating sexual aggression in men. So, would it be ok if we asked if we all belong to the same species or are certain men creatures of different origins!?
Those kinds of men cannot control their nature/instincts, so it is easier for them to control others with their natural strength.
P.S. I haven’t found one man or boy with a similar experience, being harassed by a girl. It doesn’t mean it hasn’t happened, but I haven’t heard of it yet in my environment.
Times are changing; girls are getting more and more educated about their bodies.
However, if you’d like to explore more on the subject, I suggest you visit this page:
https://www.rainn.org/articles/street-harassment
